So, about last post I made (link), maybe I was overthinking everything just a little bit too much. Its funny how a single phrase you see somewhere (in this case Twitter), mixed with mutual silence, added the fact that you both are a thousand miles away from each other can cause mild to severe misconceptions of what was being said. Or to whom it was being said. Anyways, right now I'm not too sure about what is going on, but I am bound to find out. Lately it seems like everything out there is bound to confuse me epicly in some way or another, leaving me totally dizzy and more confused and annoyed than before (and yes, that includes TOK classes - as intresting as they are, it's got to be admitted that they are very mind riddling *then again, thats the point of it, amongst many other things -.- *). So now, I just got to sit down and think what I'm going to reply back before replying blindly like I did the first time around. Maybe I was just being paranoid and taking the blame on myself with no reason whatsoever like I always do. Maybe its the other way around and this is just to confuse me. Maybe karma is getting back at me for being so slow at replying (the problem is that I often don't know how to address myself at the moment of speaking/mailing/chatting/etc., so I leave it be until I make up my mind properly). Maybe I'm just overreacting a little bit too much to everything. No clue.
Apart from the mind riddling inner conflict if knowing if I'm right or wrong (or both), lately I've been up to something that is helping the community for a greater good... well, maybe thats an overstatement. More like helping a "ecuadorian fandom" community. Trying to bring people of a country together to stand up for a common belief/like/purpose/etc. is not as easy as it seems - especially in Ecuador's case. Unlike in the United States (where people are so united that they celebrate Halloween together and where most neighbours know each other), here in Ecuador that sense of community isn't as strong unless you have something in between to help them bring them all together physically in the first place (i.e. a school, a party, a football match, a race, etc.). In my case, trying to bring people together physically isn't too easy for me because :
- I'm not a natural leader - yeah, once in a while I could take this job and whatnot, but it would just be awkward
- I know no one (face to face) who shares this common like with me
- School (Can't mix my life between school, graphic designing, art, music and fangrouping - I would have to get a schedual or proper time managing skills)
- The only mediums for bringing people together I know are through the internet, announcing stuff on the radio,aaaannndd... thats about it really :(
However, after months (2 months) of ardous work in the blog http://panicatthediscoecuador.blogspot.com/ and on it's Twitter account, it now seems like its all finally working out like I intended to. Yeah, maybe now I have like 3 Ecuadorian followers on Twitter that know about the page, and that may not sound as much - but for me its a good start. Hopefully, if this keeps going on the way it is up to this point and I keep investing my time onto this, I maybe could achieve large things with this (bringing fans together and knowing each other, projects, bringing the band to Ecuador eventually?) and that could possibly give me experience to carry on other things aside from this that are for a greater good for a community rather than to an specific group of people. Nonetheless, I'm very excited from where this is leading to.
Songs currently on: Tonight, Tonight (The Smashing Pumpkins) cover by Panic! At The Disco, The End of the World - Jon Walker, What You Want - Evanescence
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